JavaCow Library

A Java library that processes variables and operations 5 times slower than normal, simulating how a cow slowly chews and digests food. WARNING: The releaseCow() function unleashes chaotic cows that will randomly interfere with your entire application!

Features

• Cow-Speed Processing: All operations are deliberately slowed down by 5x
• Chaotic Cow Release: Release cows that randomly slow down your entire application
• Themed API: Methods like chew(), graze(), and ruminate()
• Collection Processing: Slow mapping, filtering, and counting
• Herd Management: Create multiple cows for parallel slow processing
• Fun Output: Cow emojis and themed console messages
• Random Interference: Released cows cause unpredictable delays throughout your app

Installation

Option 1: Direct from GitHub using JitPack (Easiest - No compilation needed!)

Users can include JavaCow directly from GitHub without any compilation:

Add this to your pom.xml:

<repositories>
    <repository>
        <id>jitpack.io</id>
        <url>https://jitpack.io</url>
    </repository>
</repositories>

<dependencies>
    <dependency>
		<groupId>com.github.wahIndra</groupId>
		<artifactId>javaCow</artifactId>
		<version>v1.0.0</version>
	</dependency>
</dependencies>

Option 2: Include JavaCow in your Maven project (if published to Maven Central)

Add the JavaCow library to your Maven project:

<dependency>
    <groupId>com.javacow</groupId>
    <artifactId>java-cow-lib</artifactId>
    <version>1.0.0</version>
</dependency>

Option 3: Clone and build from source

git clone https://github.com/wahIndra/javaCow.git
cd javaCow
mvn clean install

Then include in your project:

<dependency>
    <groupId>com.javacow</groupId>
    <artifactId>java-cow-lib</artifactId>
    <version>1.0.0</version>
</dependency>

Option 4: Download JAR directly

Download the JAR file from the releases page and add it to your classpath.

Quick Start

TL;DR: Add JitPack repository + dependency to your pom.xml, then call CowUtils.releaseCow("CowName") to unleash chaos! 🐄

import com.javacow.core.Cow;
import com.javacow.util.CowUtils;

// WARNING: This releases chaotic cows into your application!
CowUtils.releaseCow("ChaosCow"); // Cows now roam free and randomly slow things down!

// Traditional way for controlled slowness
Cow bessie = new Cow("Bessie");
bessie.moo(); //  Bessie says: Moooooo!

// All operations may now have random cow interference
int result = bessie.slowAdd(5, 3); // Takes ~500ms + random cow delays
String greeting = bessie.slowConcat("Hello", " ", "World!");

// Collection processing (now with random cow chaos!)
List<Integer> numbers = Arrays.asList(1, 2, 3, 4, 5);
List<Integer> doubled = CowUtils.slowMap(numbers, x -> x * 2); // Random cow interference included!

🚀 How to Make ANY Java Project 5x Slower

Want to slow down an existing Java project? Just add JavaCow and release the chaos!

Step 1: Add JavaCow to your existing project

Easiest way - Add JitPack repository and dependency to your pom.xml:

<repositories>
    <repository>
        <id>jitpack.io</id>
        <url>https://jitpack.io</url>
    </repository>
</repositories>

<dependencies>
    <dependency>
        <groupId>com.github.wahIndra</groupId>
        <artifactId>javaCow</artifactId>
        <version>master-SNAPSHOT</version>
    </dependency>
</dependencies>

Alternative - If published to Maven Central:

<dependency>
    <groupId>com.javacow</groupId>
    <artifactId>java-cow-lib</artifactId>
    <version>1.0.0</version>
</dependency>

Step 2: Release the cows in your main method or startup code

import com.javacow.util.CowUtils;

public class YourExistingApplication {
    public static void main(String[] args) {
        // Add this ONE line to make your entire application randomly slower!
        CowUtils.releaseCow("ChaosEngineer");

        // Your existing application code continues normally...
        // But now with random cow interference! 🐄
        yourExistingCode();
    }
}

Step 3: Watch the chaos unfold!

Once you call CowUtils.releaseCow("AnyName"), your entire application will experience:

• ⏰ Random delays (200ms-1000ms) throughout execution
• 🐄 Humorous cow messages in your console
• 🎲 Unpredictable performance degradation
• 🤣 Confused users wondering why everything is suddenly slow

Perfect for:

• 🎯 Load testing with realistic slowdowns
• 🎪 April Fools' pranks on your team
• 🧪 Testing application resilience under slow conditions
• 🎭 Demonstrating the importance of performance optimization

Core API

Cow Class

The main Cow class provides the core functionality:

• chew(value, function) - Process a value with a function, cow-style
• graze(supplier) - Execute a supplier with cow delays
• ruminate(runnable) - Run an operation with cow timing
• slowAdd(a, b) - Add two numbers slowly
• slowConcat(strings...) - Concatenate strings slowly
• moo() - Make the cow moo
• isChewing() - Check if the cow is currently processing

CowUtils Class

Utility methods for collection processing and cow chaos:

• releaseCow(cowName) - ⚠️ WARNING - Releases chaotic cows that randomly interfere with your entire application!
• areCowsReleased() - Check if cows are roaming free
• attemptToContainCows() - Try to contain the cows (success not guaranteed!)
• slowMap(list, function) - Map over a list slowly (with potential cow interference)
• slowFilter(collection, predicate) - Filter a collection slowly
• slowCount(collection) - Count items slowly
• createHerd(size) - Create multiple cows

Examples

⚠️ Chaotic Cow Release (Use with Caution!)

// This releases cows that will randomly interfere with your ENTIRE application!
CowUtils.releaseCow("ChaosCow");

// Now ALL operations in your app may randomly experience:
// - CPU pipeline blocking by chewing cows
// - Memory meetings of roaming cows
// - Network delays from playing cows
// - File system reorganization by confused cows

// Check if chaos has been unleashed
if (CowUtils.areCowsReleased()) {
    System.out.println(" Cows are roaming free and causing chaos!");
}

// Try to contain them (may fail due to stubborn cows)
CowUtils.attemptToContainCows();

Easy Library Usage

Cow cow = new Cow("Daisy");

// Each operation takes ~500ms
int sum = cow.slowAdd(10, 20);
String text = cow.slowConcat("Slow", " ", "Processing");
String upper = cow.chew("hello", String::toUpperCase);

Collection Processing

List<String> words = Arrays.asList("cow", "bull", "calf", "cattle");

// Filter words with length <= 4 (each check takes ~500ms)
List<String> shortWords = CowUtils.slowFilter(words, word -> word.length() <= 4);

// Double all numbers (each operation takes ~500ms)
List<Integer> numbers = Arrays.asList(1, 2, 3);
List<Integer> doubled = CowUtils.slowMap(numbers, x -> x * 2);

Herd Operations

// Create a herd of 3 cows
Cow[] herd = CowUtils.createHerd(3);

// Each cow can process independently
for (int i = 0; i < herd.length; i++) {
    final int index = i;
    herd[i].ruminate(() -> {
        System.out.println("Cow " + (index + 1) + " is working!");
    });
}

Why Use JavaCow?

• 🎯 Load Testing: Simulate slow operations and network delays in your tests
• ⏱️ Performance Benchmarking: Add controlled delays to measure application resilience
• 🎪 Chaos Engineering: Introduce random slowdowns to test system behavior
• 📚 Educational: Demonstrate the impact of slow operations on user experience
• 🎭 Team Pranks: Release cows in staging to confuse your colleagues
• 🐄 Fun: Because who doesn't want cow-themed programming chaos?

Performance Impact

Controlled Slowness (Regular Cow methods):

• Base processing time: 100ms
• Slowdown factor: 5x
• Total delay per operation: 500ms

Chaotic Slowness (After releaseCow):

• Random delays: 200ms - 1000ms
• Interference probability: 20-40% per operation
• Background chaos: Every 2 seconds
• Containment success rate: ~50% (cows are stubborn!)

🚀 Repository & Development

Building

mvn clean compile
mvn test
mvn package

Running Examples

🚀 Repository & Development

GitHub Repository: https://github.com/wahIndra/javaCow

Building from Source

git clone https://github.com/wahIndra/javaCow.git
cd javaCow
mvn clean compile
mvn test
mvn package

Running Examples

mvn exec:java -Dexec.mainClass="com.javacow.examples.CowExample"

Development Setup

1. Clone the repository
2. Import into your IDE as a Maven project
3. Run tests: mvn test
4. Build JAR: mvn package
5. The compiled JAR will be in target/java-cow-lib-1.0.0.jar

📝 License

This project is open source. Feel free to use it in your projects! (But don't blame us when your production systems suddenly start mooing)

🤝 Contributing

Contributions are welcome! Ideas for new cow chaos:

• More creative cow interference messages
• Additional random slowdown patterns
• Cow-themed performance metrics
• Integration with monitoring tools
• Different cow personalities with unique behaviors

Please feel free to submit pull requests or open issues at https://github.com/wahIndra/javaCow

⚠️ Disclaimer

WARNING: This library is designed to intentionally slow down your applications. Use responsibly and never in production unless you really, really want your users to experience the zen of cow-speed computing.

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🐄 Happy Cow Coding! 🐄

"In a world of fast code, be the cow that chews slowly."